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Moving Ahead

The process of getting on with your life...

What would it be like to stop time and analyze every decision before actually making it? Most of us would spend our lives in limbo, too scared to decide anything. But life whisks us along, and we all have to keep pace with time.
Finding out you are pregnant is no exception to this rule. Even though you might want to wish the whole thing away, you are still pregnant, and the clock will not stop while you decide what to do next.

Time is a big factor in your situation. The longer you wait to face the issue, the more you limit your options. One of the first things you need to do for yourself is to face the reality of your pregnancy. The sooner you do that, the sooner you can get control of the situation. After you have let the reality of your pregnancy sink in, you need to tell those who can give you the most support. Options Magazine’s article titled “Psst...I’m having a baby!” will give you some good advice on how to tell and who to tell.

Getting help from a trained counselor is also a good idea at this point. This way, you’ll have someone who can help you think rationally through the whole thing before you make a decision. Will you have the baby? Will you keep the baby? Will you raise it alone, or will you marry? Although no one should rush into these decisions, you should plan to answer these questions as quickly as possible. Putting the decision off only limits your options. Lastly, your decision must be made by you, because you are the one who will be most affected by its consequences. Examine the options, and choose the one you feel is best for you.

After you have decided how you will handle your pregnancy, you need to start creating a plan. Each section of Options has an article on implementation that will give you some clear-cut guidelines on how to put each option into action.

List on a piece of paper your values and the circumstances in your life that impact your decision. For instance:
“I have not graduated yet.”
“I do not really believe in abortion.”
“I do not even have a job.”
“How would I support a child?”

Next, refer to your list when considering each of your available options. This will help you to understand the consequences of choosing one option over another.

No matter how you opt to handle your pregnancy, find a counselor who can help you make the best decisions for you and your baby. Your school counselor can point the way to a good pregnancy counselor, or you can let your fingers do the walking in the yellow pages under “Pregnancy Counseling and Information” or “Abortion Alternatives.” You can also call Options Magazine at 1-866-OPT-MAGS or simply go to our web site at www.optionsmagazine.com for a free referral to a qualified counselor in your area.

Counselors can help you with important issues such as continuing your education, getting or keeping a job, or legal and social issues that you are dealing with. They can help you sort it all out and make a plan when you feel as if your emotions are being stretched like taffy.

Most important, create a plan that addresses important life questions such as: How will I implement the option I have chosen? How will I cover the costs? Where will I live? How can I continue or further my education or career? Then start implementing that plan right away so you can get on with your life. Finally, you need to trust in yourself and know that you will get through this okay. Your life is not ending; it is just changing course.

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