Options Magazine » What Next Articles

I’m What?

How To Deal With The News That You are Pregnant

Right now, you can hardly think straight. You find yourself in a conversation with a friend and don’t hear a word they are saying, because your mind is on another planet. You are nervous and preoccupied with thinking that maybe you are pregnant. Even sitting still gives you sweaty palms.

If you are going through any of these emotions, most likely you have missed a period and you think you may be pregnant. Don’t panic. A late period can result from a lot of factors. (In fact, just stressing over whether you are pregnant can be one of them.) Some women skip a period when they first become sexually active. If you fit into this category, you may have a good reason to relax. But you do need to make sure. If it turns out you are pregnant, there are plenty of decisions to make, and the sooner you get to them, the better.

First Things First...
First, find out whether you are pregnant. If all you did was kiss, you can be sure you are not pregnant! The easiest way to know whether you are pregnant is to use a home pregnancy test. You can buy them at a grocery store or a drugstore. They are inexpensive, and some may be used as early as the first day of your missed period. Keep in mind, though, that these tests are not always 100 percent accurate.

The most accurate way to know whether you are pregnant is to go to the doctor. They will give you a pelvic exam and/or order a blood test. These tests are especially recommended if your home test results were positive. You can find clinics for these tests in the yellow pages under “Pregnancy Counseling and Information.” Some clinics will even offer free pregnancy testing. If you are embarrassed about buying a home pregnancy test, you might do that in another part of town. If confidentiality is important to you, call first to make sure the clinic you have chosen does not disclose the test results to anyone. If your tests are not free, you need to bring cash if you do not want your parents to receive a bill.

My tests are positive...
If all your test results tell you a baby is on its way, believe them. Coming to grips with the fact that you are pregnant may make you feel like a volcano that’s been waiting to burst. Go ahead. Burst! Everything you feel inside is normal: shock, hurt, disbelief, guilt, shame, and confusion are all part of this. You might even be experiencing denial, telling yourself “I’m not pregnant” or “I can’t be pregnant” or “I won’t think about it.” Denial is common for women in this situation, and it’s part of moving ahead. But staying in extended denial only wastes time and limits your options.

No matter how you decide to handle your pregnancy, you are going to experience some uncomfortable emotions, all of which are normal.

Finally...
It would be nice if we were all made like rubber bands, able to snap back from anything. But since we are not, we can be thankful for friends and counselors. Most women seek help from friends they can trust, but it is also important for you to find a good counselor with whom you can talk about your situation. Some women seek professional counseling. (If the word “professional” raises a red flag in your mind, think of it as simply someone who knows a little more than just the average Joe.) Counselors are people who have been trained to help you explore all of your options and accept the reality of your situation. They have typically worked with hundreds of women in your situation, and they have sound advice regardless of the decisions you make.

If you decide that you want to talk to a counselor, you can find one through your school counselor or a clergy member or in the yellow pages under “Pregnancy Counseling and Information” or “Abortion Alternatives.” Just remember: the sooner you reach out, the better. Making the best decision for you and your baby is easier if you keep a clear mind and seek advice from someone who knows what you are dealing with.

“If it turns out you are pregnant, there are plenty of decisions to make, and the sooner you get to them, the better.”

© OPTIONS MAGAZINE, INC. All Rights Reserved.
Call 1-866-OPT-MAGS or email info@optionsmagazine.com